Birthdaypalooza

School. No, seriously.

Today was Arya's first day of school, so... that's a thing. She was pretty super about it, and her new teacher seems to think she's the bee's knees, although she has a serious hatred of her blazer(1).

But I'm not going to talk about school yet. I want to talk about birthdays, because everyone seems to be having them.

Right before the summer, Arya's BFF(oalfn)(2) Amiya had her birthday party at the local soft play, and we gave out some invites. We had to miss Sebbie's party, because Hanna was working and it was in the middle of nowhere, but then Arya had her party at the end of August.

Although she was keen on a soft play party after Amiya's do, we organised a party at Build-a-Bear Workshop(3), because it seemed like a way not to have to do too much organising. Hanna's parents covered a lot of the cost, and we booked into the Cambridge store for what we began to realise after Arya wanted to do a second round of invites could be up to thirteen children. In the end there were, I think, eight, and some siblings, and a riotous time was had be all as they had the run of the shop before opening time, played with the made-up toys on roller skates, chose and stuffed their bears, made wishes for themselves and for Arya(4), and bopped around to the same thirty seconds of 'Get Back Up Again', the catchiest of the tunes from Dreamworks' Trolls, over and over, having worked out how to make the sound station work. It could have been terrible, but the lass in the shop was clearly trained for this stuff, and while they hadn't all paid by the time the doors opened to the general public, they were mostly in the queue.

Adorbs.

After the bears, we went for lunch at Wagamama's, where the staff happily wrangled our charging crew, although they did put us right by the easiest gap for small children to dash for the stairs unseen through. Feedback on the day has been overwhelmingly positive, and it feels like there's a pretty big expectation to meet next year, especially given we were pretty much planning next year to be three friends for a homecooked meal and pin the tale on the affordably priced donkey. On balance, we're glad that everyone had a good time. It's just a bit of a tough act to follow.

So, that was two parties in the space of a month and... wait, there's more?

Love him and hug him and call him George
(she's actually called Lady.)

The day after Arya's party it was her friend Saul's, which was just down the road from us. Yay! I checked out early, leaving Andrew to bring Arya back, but she seems to have had a good time and she came back with a party bag including an Incredible Hulk Lego figure, which she was made up about. She decided he was lonely though, so he's now hanging out with Lord Voldemort from Lego Dimensions, because that's a buddy comedy that can only end brilliantly.

And then yesterday - was it really only yesterday? - was Chloe's birthday, on a farm. There was feeding sheep and goats - Arya got nervous and tossed food at them - and petting Rex rabbits and bearded dragons. Arya was mightily taken with the rabbit, but less so with the corn snakes, and had a grand time. Sadly, Chloe and Saul were both in Nursery 1 going on Nursery 2, so won't be in Reception with Arya, but hopefully we can keep in touch.

Anyway, that was the festival of birthdays, and the end of the school holiday. Next stop, Reception.

(1) In fairness, I probably would have felt the same about a school blazer. I still feel that way about suit jackets.
(2) Best Friend Forever (or a least for now.)
(3) This was her second party, having been ill for her actual birthday party.
(4) I wished for her to deal well with being handed a fistful of wishes.

Scenes from my family

"Wonder Arya!"
"No! It's Wonder Woman."
"Right you are, Arya. Silly of me to forget."

Arya is putting minifigures on the Lego Dimensions board, looking for Voldemort.

Me: "Who's that?"
Arya:" It's Wonder Woman! You remember. She's got her loop-de-hoop."

I'm not sure which is more adorable. Calling the Lasso of Truth/Lariat of Hestia a 'loop-de-hoop', or the fact that she assumed I was asking because I'd forgotten.

-

Bedtime.

Arya: Cuddle, Daddy.
<cuddles ensue>
Me: Now lie down and sleep, lovely.
Arya: But this is for you, Daddy. You looked down. You looked blue. And I don't like you being sad.

-

In the shop, after being told she isn't allowed treats because she's becoming spoiled.

Arya: Cakes are treats.
Me: Which means we aren't getting any, Arya.
Arya: I know. I was just saying that we can't buy any cakes.

-

The Doctor Machine:

Arya, climbing on Daddy's chest: I'm the Doctor who's coming to kill you. It's a game!
Me: What game?
Arya: The Furchester game with the Doctor Machine.
Me: What game is this? I want to see it. I may need to write to Cbeebies.

-

Arya came up to Mummy while she was watching the SDCC Ragnarok trailer. She caught a bit and was excited. 

"Hulk!" she exclaimed, because she's always been a bit of a fan. I told her that Hulk in the gladiator armour was 'angry Hulk', so she decided that without he was 'proper Hulk.' Then we got to the end and she laughed delightedly.

"I didn't know he could *talk*!"

Just for the record, we have never sat down and talked about the Hulk with Arya. We've never watched any Hulk with her until this (afterwards, she watched The Incredible Hulk with Mummy and Daddy Andrew.) Yet she's known for years who Hulk is, and what he does (smash.)

Breakfast with Arya

She's a bear without her morning coffee(1).

Me: Arya, come on; we need to hurry because it took you thirty minutes to eat *three piece of cereal.*
Arya: (utterly aggrieved) I didn't!
<beat>
I ate *four*.
Me: I love you.

*

Me: Chocolate stars?
Arya: Can I have eggs after? Scrambled eggs?
Me: No, Arya. It's much too late for that. We have to get going and... Was that a joke?
Arya: Yes!
Me: Points for effort definitely.
Arya: I'm funny!
Me: Well, you certainly think so. You get that from your dad. Both of us.

(1) Just... before abyone calls social services, it was 4 in the afternoon and it's a child's hot chocolate in a large cup.

Mr Squeakums, the Genderfluid Mouse

A couple of scenes I'm not sure I wrote up here.

Arya: I'm not sure if Mousie(1) is a boy or a girl.
Me: Well *Mr* Squeakums(2) would usually suggest male, but what do you think.
Arya: I think 'she'.
Me: <nods> Although you definitely said he yesterday. Do you think she'll always be female now, or sometimes she and sometimes he?
Arya: Sometimes he.
Me: When she... Or when *he* feels like it?
Arya: Yes.
Me: Mr Squeakums is genderfluid. Awesome.

*

Arya: I hope our train comes fast, because I want to go to nursery because I have Mousie*.
Me: You hear that, Mousie? You're a good influence.
Arya: How dare you say that?

*

A talk was had with Arya after a second viewing of Beauty and the Beast and she found Le Fou dancing with another man amusing.

I told her that some boys like to dance with other boys, and that's okay. It's not a joke, and in fact it's rather lovely to see in the film, because for so long boys have been told that they can't dance with boys. In fact, I told her, you can dance with whoever you like.

Arya: So it could be a boy and a girl?
Me: Or a boy and a boy.
Arya: Or a girl and a girl!

So I think she got it.

And of course, I reminded her that the one thing that is really important is that they want to dance with you as well.

*

Me: Arya; just one squeeze of soap.
<Arya takes four>
Me: Arya...
Arya: Why I take four is because I'm four years old.
Me: Yes, but you only need one.
Arya: Would you do me four of the other soap*.
Me: Why would I do that?
Arya: Because you're my dad and you're lovely.
Me: Darn your logic!

(1) A small, knitted muse that her Aunt Sadie made for her.

(2) Mr Squeakums is Mousie's usual name.

Another first!

Serious Arya is serious.

This morning, Arya did her first proper bed wetting.

I doubt she'll thank me for putting this in the blog, but it was quite the red letter day. Daddy and Daddy failed to get her into a nappy last night, and so she wet the bed when she had an accident without padding... at half past six this morning.

So, having managed to go the entire night without an accident, she called me in and we got her undressed, cleaned up and into bed with Mummy, and stripped off the bedclothes for washing, with really no fuss whatsoever. I am so proud of my little girl today.

No pictures of the event in progress, of course, but here's one of her looking especially grown up and serious.

Snippets

Arya 'copes' with mornings.

It's been a while since I posted here, in part because as a full-time ersatz I don't have the same structure; partly because I take fewer photos as a full-timer and thus post snippets to Facebook, where I am reluctant to post too many pictures. So, here's a bit of a digest:

The other day, Arya and I were walking to school. Arya ignored my pointed hints about how it would be super helpful if someone were to carry their own bag, but then suggested we use the gate that only has one handle on it, because that would be easier with my hands full. Spontaneous empathy FTW.

Bath time:

Arya (fills a cup with pink, bubbly bath water): "Here, Daddy. Drink this. It will make you poorly."
Me: "You're not selling this, Arya."

Wicked witch is apparently on her career plan still. (I told her she was bringing the religion into disrepute; she laughed.)

Rosie Revere, Engineer became the latest book to be resisted for days with insistence that she didn't/wouldn't like it, only for it to become a firm favourite once she'd actually heard it.

Enjoying the original Rapunzel, we agreed that just bringing a rope would have been much more useful than bringing a ball of silk a night to weave a ladder from. I mean, he's a Prince; he has a horse, and people.

Full-Time Ersatz

It's really starting to hit home what a full-time job parenting is.

It's summer, it's hot, it's light from Oh-My-Life in the morning to What-the-Heck at night, everyone's tired, and it doesn't stop. Of course it doesn't, I hear you say, but knowing that is't the same as knowing it, which isn't the same as Arya calling pitiously for you at four in the morning.

Right now, Empire has messed up her sleep patterns (10 o'clock last night,) and everyone is tired. Arya is pushing Hanna's buttons and I'm fraying badly at the edges. I had a weekend on my own to recoup some spoons, but in the end it seems to have spoiled me and now I'm twitching about sharing my space again. And then everything went wrong this morning - my fault; I should have made sure she was up instead of having a shower - but I still have to go and get her this evening, and attend her transition evening before we can bus home and I try to get her to sleep nicely at 8ish.

And yet...

We got into school this morning, late, but we got there, and she ran to hug one of her teachers, then back to hug me, and all the stress and the grief was just... nothing.

So yeah; it never ends, but I never wonder why I'm doing it. She's why. She's all the why.