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Nine Months

Arya is nine months old today, and the baby book site we use has provided us with its usual linguistically eccentric list of developmental milestones.

Grizzle Biscuit's Dad,

Grizzle Biscuit is 9Ms old today! She might embrace some new growth milestones around her 9Ms old. Let's wait together for her growth milestones:

I confess, this site is a little presumptuous and even over-familiar sometimes, but it is a good place to store photos from all three parents.

Most babies at this time, they can stand while holding onto something, jabber or combine syllable, understand object permanence. We can't wait for these beautiful moments!

I posted the images of her standing the other day, and she can jabber for England; has been doing for a while, and in speech-like constructs. As for object permanence, the persistence with which she extracts the pen from my top pocket or follows the car keys when I try to hide them shows that she's been doing this for a while now.

For half babies at this time, they can cruise while holding onto furniture, drink from a sippy cup, eat with fingers, bang objects together.

As ever, she's a little iffy on this middle bracket. She's working up to cruising, but isn't there yet, and I'm pretty sure she could drink from a sippy cup, but chooses not to. She can bang objects into static things, but not quite each other, but she eats well with her fingers, and has rudimentary spoon control.

If Grizzle Biscuit is able to play patty-cake and peek-a-boo, say "mama" or "dada" to the correct parent. I have to say, such an incredible baby she is! Only a few babies can do these things! So, let's not forget to stamp on the Peekaboo Moments!

I'm always a little disturbed at the idea of stamping on the Peekaboo Moments.

Patty-cake we haven't done, but she plays peek-a-boo as the active participant and is beginning to distinguish mama and dada(s).

Cinebaby

This Saturday we had our more-or-less weekly trip to the cinema, this time to see Frozen; which I think Arya actually enjoyed. She's actually getting to the developmental stage that she registers the film, and either enjoys - or not - what she sees.

She did not enjoy Catching Fire and its screaming monkeys. Frozen had reindeer ventriloquism, trolls and lots of songs, and was much more her cup of tea.

The gif that keeps on gyfing

Isn't she amazing?

Standing

With a little support, but no help, Arya is now able to stand up by herself. She managed the pictured stance purely by leaning on the box; Andrew is there only in case she loses her balance and tries to swan dive off the bed.

Soon there will be no stopping her, and all of her parents will be nervous wrecks.

Peekaboo

On Saturday, as a means of keeping Arya entertained for a few minutes, I introduced her to peekaboo, holding up her blanket to hide behind and then dropping it with the traditional cry of 'peekaboo'; you know the drill.

A little later, sitting with her blanket in her lap, Arya picked it up between spread hands, lifted it to hide her face, then after a few moments dropped it away with a cry of delight.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!

Time of the Arya

First Day

This Saturday was my first solo-day looking after Arya.

We got up early and Hannah went to work. I couldn't get Arya back to sleep, because I can't walk her around lying down as Daddy Andrew does. Maybe because I'm slightly taller, or just from some habit, when I carry her, she will fight like a demon to sit up so she can gaze regally around at the world beneath her.

We went into town quite early, had a dispute with Costa over the speed of their service (they were very nice about it, so we stuck around for hot chocolate and a bottle), and did some Christmas shopping.

We came home and had some lunch, then Arya squiggled on the floor; a lot. She's so very, very mobile now that it takes me by surprise. She also has a habit of finding anything dangerous within reach. I was sadly unable to get a photo of her reaching for Mummy's Nerf Maverick.

To close out the afternoon, we listened to old TV and movie themes, and I flew her around the room to the Superman theme. Mummy was later than I expected, so we had to do an emergency feed after Andrew arrived, but otherwise it was good; much less of a cack-handed disaster than I'd expected.

On Sunday, we took a few photos for her Gran to make a calendar. We figure this is October:

More gyfs

Did I mention these make me smile?

My new phone pic...

...is a shot of Hannah with Arya wearing my Doctor Who scarf (which Hannah knitted for me).

How awesome is this?

She likes to move it, move it!

My little girl; she's growing up so fast.

A weekend at Mum and Dad's

This weekend I took an extra day's holiday on Friday and Hannah and I took Arya to Norfolk to see Granny and Grandpa Slater. I think a good time was had by all, even if the walk to see the quilt exhibition was a little longer than expected.

At least 50% of the way to using a spoon.

Travelin' in style!

Upgrade this!

A lovely little mover!

Superstar!

I really love that last one, which my Dad took. It's my new desktop background at work and I think it's one of the most beautiful pictures of my beautiful little girl.

Eeek!

This weekend, Arya achieved another first, managing to propel herself backwards at such speed that her father was unable to prevent her slithering feet first off the bed and onto the floor.

A visit to A&E soothed nerves (while consuming much of the Sunday), but I still feel guilty, and apprehensive of her new mobility (especially as she has since managed to scoot around the floor and unearth plastic bags, cables, nappy sacks and anything else we really don't want her finding and gumming at).

Gyfs

Google has started backing up photos from our phones, and in some cases turning them into animated gifs. These make me smile a lot.

Six months later

Time does fly, doesn't it, and now my little girl - our little girl - is six months old. We had a party for her and everything; Hannah and Andrew worked wonders to get everything set up before I got home and it was wonderful.

She's so big and so mobile and she talks so much, even if she doesn't have the words yet.

She loves hitting buttons, or possibly trying to rip the keys off the keyboard.

She is fascinated by patterns of strongly contrasting shades: The checks on my shirt; the mottling on her toy orca.

She loves care tags.

She explores things; touches, tastes. She's starting towards weaning, putting food into her mouth and gumming on our fingers.

She's not quite crawling yet; or rather, she can go backwards and turn in circles, but hasn't quite managed forwards.

She can sit up, almost stand on her own, move her head around and throw her weight in any direction.

She is a baby, just like any other, I guess; but she's the most wonderful thing in the world to me.

She's half a year old, and I can't imagine what my life was, or would be, without her.

Of children and gaming

Saturday was the AGM of the Isles of Darkness, which saw my motion to expand allowances for parents at games go through. I was actually staggered by how my of a weight it took off my mind, and how much of my negativity and dissatisfaction vanished once this was done. I feel good about games again.

Arya... apparently less so.

Sleep Dep

The day after Hannah and Arya leave, I always have trouble sleeping. I don't know if it's the absence of them next to me or the fact that I can't hear them breathing, but it gets me every time.

Day of the Dad

On Sunday, Hannah went to game, leaving Andrew and me to look after the baby for about four hours. It played out roughly like this.

12:30 - Hannah headed off and we walked to Waitrose, which provided a nice distraction for Arya.

13:15 - Got home, Andrew changed the baby.

13:30 - Andrew tagged out. Arya got a little fractious about lying down. I sat her up, she looked around, clocked the lack of mummy and launched into a wordless diatribe on the subject of her immense tiredness and dissatisfaction with our failure to be mummy. We loaded her into the wrap and walked her around the courtyard outside the flat.

13:50 - Arya fell asleep and Andrew got to have lunch.

13:20 - Arya woke up. There followed some passing between daddies, a change, and some tummy time surrounded by her toys. (Note to self, too many toys is overwhelming).

Her favourite seems to be the orca pillow, since it has the biggest care label ever! and care labels are way more fun than anything else, except perhaps tubs full of stuff, plastic bottles and takeaway cola cup lids.

14:45 - Arya got thirsty and Andrew gave her some water. This was due to a shared misapprehension of our instructions regarding bottles.

15:20 - Arya got antsy again, so I gave her a bottle of expressed milk, which she inhaled. (Not literally; that would have been bad.) We got her some more milk, but she was less interested and spent twenty minutes more squirming madly.

15:40 - We put some Muppets on and sang along to her. As noted previously, she loves the Muppets, and singing, and while I don't want to raise her on TV, as long as we are also talking to her and playing with her, I am happy if we can sing along while enjoying stuff with her when she's tired and fractious.

16:20 - Mummy returned. When I held Arya on my knee, she literally flung herself at Hannah. Despite this, I feel that we did pretty well, and I for one feel like a halfway capable parent for perhaps the first time. Given how hard our double team had to work on what was, all told, a very good day, I am more than ever in awe of Hannah.

About that Holiday

This last weekend, we went up to Leeds - well, Rothwell - to spend time with Hannah's parents. We were also there to clear out her things from the loft.

There may have been one or two stuffed animals. I got to keep the full colour monitor, as Hannah seemed unable to deny me the pun. I have it sat by my desk; I always wanted a dual monitor set-up. We also identified a lot of potential furniture for my new flat, which is pretty awesome, and I borrowed a dummy flintlock which will be putting in an appearance as Dick Turpin's pistol in a future Geist game (to be known as 'the Turpinator').

While we were there, we were once more given the opportunity to recall that, however many toys we might buy her, nothing will ever compare with random stuff in Arya's eyes. In particular, she loves things that crinkle, like the lids from fast food coke cups, and things with buttons.

Observe how she favours the Sky remote (which she managed to disable completely by switching it to operate a DVD player that they don't have or something) over Dragobert, despite the fact that he make a crinkly noise when cuddled.

I love how curious she is about everything, wanting to explore and handle things, which by the by includes our teeth.

To finish up, here is a particularly adorable photograph of Arya in a blue box. I maintain that she must have been disappointed to find it no larger on the inside.

Back to Reality

After a wonderful holiday, visiting Hannah's family in Leeds, Hannha and Andrew have taken Arya back to Ipswich for the next couple of days. As ever, I am missing them already.

While we were there, however, Arya made her first motion towards steps. She can't roll over yet, but with me supporting her, she took three definite steps forward. It seems that she is determined to skip all the middle stages of development, as each time we get one of those lists of 'most babies should..., some babies could..., a few babies might...', she has the should down pat, but seems to be working on the might while ignoring the could.

I suspect that she will never bother to crawl.

More Gorillas

Daddy Andrew and I took Arya-Rose walking in Norwich this weekend. We finally caught up with the Ape'd Crusader:

We also took a look at the Utopia building.

Arya-Rose is becoming more and more aware of her surroundings, and loves exploring things. She spent several hours over the weekend trying to open bottles and tins of hot chocolate powder, and sat through The Wolverine playing with a cup lid (which I also found more interesting than the movie at times).

Baby's First G+ Post

This morning, as I sat with Arya at the computer, singing Bohemian Rhapsody with the Muppets, she began to reach towards the keyboard. I went into G+ and let her have at it, with the upshot that this is now recorded on G+ as Arya's first post:

wbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbxcm  n  =];]/eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiik[===k\wxdj\ c[[

Days of Film and Pizza

Yesterday was a long day, with games for daddies and Pacific Rim (attempt 2, successful) for Mummy and Arya, followed by lunch, Monsters University, dinner, and finally Macbeth via NT Live.

Arya was a darling pretty much from start to finish (except when I managed to cough just as she was dropping off at the very beginning of Monsters U), despite the long day, changing light levels and cinematic noise. During dinner, however, she made another declaration of her readiness to wean, when she reached out from my lap with mantis-like swiftness, grabbed a slice of my pizza and hauled it to her.

Fortunately she didn't manage to cram any of the crisp-crusted, gluteny goodness into her adorable, soft-gummed, coeliac face, but it was a near thing. I am also pretty impressed by the speed and dexterity with which the snatch was achieved.

Gorillas in the Midst

 Today we took Arya-Rose into Norwich and looked for gorillas. It's this year's civic exhibition, a series of gorilla figures, decorated by different people. This is Lumley, in M&S.

This is Besty. Like Lumley, Besty was just decorated a little bit. That's why my favourite was the one that was most heavily modded: Optimus Primate.

Truk and munky.

Freddie 'Radio Go-Go' Gorilla clearly belonged to a subspecies native to the uncanny valley.

 And this one? He is Iron Ape.

Arya-Rose's Magical Moments

These are some of the things that Arya-Rose loves to do with her parents.

We're Going on a Bear Hunt - because it's a classic. We're working out proper routines for doing the poem solo, duet and three hand, and she loves it.

Where's My Shoggoth, which is mostly me making strange noises. Goes down a storm.

Being read to, although a chapter is about her focus limit. We're having a go with The Thirteen Clocks at the moment.

Being sung to.

The Muppets. I'm sure she's starting to move along with Popcorn, and The Rainbow Connection seems to be another big hit. In general she likes the Muppets, probably because (see above) they sing.

Father's Day

Today is my first Father's Day on the other side of the fence, as it were. My baby girl - aided by her mother - got me a pair of rather swish waistcoats, one of which I was able to run in a little during the weekend and the other which has a fine future at least as Mage costume, once I can get into my linen suit to play casual Apollonius.

Three Months Later

Three months. It hardly seems real. Sometimes it feels like nothing at all, sometimes like she's been with us forever. She's cooing and gurgling and alert; she loves to sit up and look around. She can focus on her parents, at least she can when she's not sitting with them. If I hold her, she looks at Hannah or Andrew, and vice versa.

Happy three month birthday, Arya-Rose.

Nevermind

Today I went swimming with my baby girl for the first time. It wasn't my first time swimming of course, nor hers - she's been with her mother several times - but it is the first time I've been in a while.

To say I was nervous was an understatement. I took the morning off work, and part of me was expecting that she would howl and scream and hate me forever for getting her wet. In fact, she was lovely and it was an amazing experience. Hannah showed me all the things they do in baby swim classes and I took her for a swim (I pulled her along while calling out 'kick-kick-kick' like a loon, and possibly at one point 'tekili-li' instead), floated her, anointed her head with water (to teach her to hold her breath) and then swam her underwater, which was a little heart-stopping, but she took it in fine form.

We also spent several minutes just watching each other while she floated, and apparently the sight of me is no longer weird and scary to her. In fact, I think she really is beginning to recognise me as someone who has a place in her life, which is an incredible feeling.

We went during family swim time, so the pool was full of small girls pointing at Arya and going 'aww'.

Then I swam six lengths of the main pool (150m, which isn't bad after such a long break) and joined the girls in the changing village to finish up. I have a leisure card now, so I need to make sure I swim from time to time.

Note to self for next time: Remember £1 coin for lockers.

In more general news, she continues to beat the curve on vocalisation and - if her attempts to gnaw my finger off are any indication - also teething.

Development Hell

In a lot of ways, Arya-Rose is ahead of the curve.

She's highly aware of her surroundings and, for her age, incredibly mobile. Her legs have remarkable strength - she can bear her weight easily, but is still a long way off being able to balance - and she is starting to grip with impressive power. She has also managed, at two months old, to nail down the difference between night and day, and to recognise that night is for sleeping.

Unfortunately, as she is still young enough to need about eighteen hours sleep in a twenty-four hour period, this means she is forcing herself to stay awake in the daylight, becoming grumpy by nightfall and generally making it hard for her mother in particular to get anything done during the day.

But she is wonderful in the mornings, smiling at us and waving her arms around and making preliminary vocalisations like a good un. We also spent a fine hour last night singing sad folk songs to her while Hannah got some sewing done.

My Girls

To set the scene, last week I was told I would get no compensation for the crap I went through with my bathroom, not even a small rent rebate, and to stop me arguing the estate agents essentially threatened to evict me for having Hannah and Arya living at the flat if I didn't just go along with it.

So I did.

Now, Hannah, Andrew and I are all members of the Isles of Darkness Roleplaying Society. On Saturday, as I was warming up towards Sunday's games in Norwich as a way of letting off steam and putting this business behind me, I got an email telling me that we weren't allowed to take Arya-Rose to games; that her presence made some people 'uncomfortable'.

This was news to us, as everyone who had spoken to us had been more than happy to have her around.

It was also, we figured, blatant discrimination against breastfeeding mothers to not allow them to play because their baby wasn't allowed in the game room. We pointed this out and were told we could have her in the out of character areas as long as no-one was running a scene there, which still pretty much froze Hannah out when we went along to Norwich. Since she's the driver and effectively can't do anything when we're there, I shall probably not be going to Norwich until Arya is able to spend closer to even time with Hannah, Andrew and I so we each get two-thirds of a game. I love the games there, but even if she would, it's really not fair to ask someone to drive you to a game they can't participate in.

I'm looking at putting up a motion to change the rules, but for now it's a real block to our doing anything in the society.

But that's not what gets me. I actually understand where people might be coming from. We play games with 'dark, mature themes' and I figure I might well feel uncomfortable playing a psychopathic monster with a baby in the room. If someone had said that to us, I'm pretty sure we'd have happily taken Arya aside, or into the OOC area for a while; likewise if she were kicking off.

That isn't what happened though. Instead, someone or someones went behind our backs to complain that we were making them uncomfortable, not to the local level coordinators, but to the National Coordinator.

Well, guess what, now I feel uncomfortable, and I get twitchy when I'm uncomfortable, and irritable, and angry. My reaction has actually been used as a rationale for why people didn't want to confront me directly, but seriously, this is not my reaction to people not wanting to game around my little girl; it's my reaction to people running behind my back to tell tales to the teacher and make someone else bear the brunt of our displeasure - and, I am pleased to say, that of the very many friends who have shown support for us in this - because they assumed that we'd be petty and unreasonable about it.

Had we been approached reasonably, a reasonable compromise could have been sought. As it is, there was no reason, no negotiation; we've just been given the bare minimum consideration that the law requires in favour of the sensibilities of those who have refused to engage us on the subject, and with no regard whatsoever for our feelings. As to those, it feels to me as if Hannah is being excluded and Andrew and I are being asked to choose between the IoD and Hannah and Arya, and that's not even a choice.

My girls, every time.

And I apologise for the passive-aggressive tone of this post, but I don't actually have a choice, as I do not know who it is that did this.

And now the screaming begins

Arya-Rose is having a bad week. She wants to be with her Mummy pretty much all of the time, and when she isn't, she screams.

And I feel like the devil. The fact that my ability to even temporarily house her has been called into question by a dispute with my estate agents doesn't help of course.

But sometimes she'll lie peacefully in my arms, even if only for a short while, and smile at me, and I know that it is all worthwhile. I just have to hold onto that when she's making me feel like I must have hurt her without meaning it.

Gone baby, gone

Hannah left this evening, taking Arya-Rose to visit her grandmother in Edinburgh. She'll be picking up her mother en route for an extended visit and a four-generational photo op.

I'm going to miss them, especially with all that's going on with her at the moment. At six weeks old, Arya is going to start recognising faces, voices; she's just starting to smile properly, to vocalise in a more complex fashion. She's a long way off speaking, but there will be so much going on that I'm scared I'll miss.

Part-Time Parenting

I guess you could say that I'm a part-time parent, and in some respects that is true. I see Arya-Rose most weekends, but not during the week, and this allows me a level of sleep - in theory - that most parents are denied; or I would do if I wasn't cramming all the writing, planning, video watching and game playing I don't get done at weekends into what I disingenuously refer to as 'the evening'.

But on the other hand, my heart doesn't work in shifts, you know? I don't get time off from worrying, or missing her, any more than being away from her mother makes me stop caring for her. I think that the feeling that I'm missing something, that I'm not doing my best for her because I'm not there, is one of my greatest fears.

I had an unexpected bonus visit yesterday, but spent most of it working on Saturday's game. I told Hannah I felt bad and she said: "You had work to do." I realised then that I hope I never use that as an excuse for neglecting either of them.

Unimpressed Baby is Unimpressed

Arya-Rose asks: "What about my tiny dignity?"

Fear

Yesterday, I misjudged a distance very slightly while changing Arya-Rose and her head dropped about an inch, no more, onto the changing table. There was a soft bump and she screamed, and I felt like the devil.
She's fine; not hurt at all. It was a horrible moment, however, and not least because I have a morbid fear of dropping Arya. I have done since Hannah brought her in to the office. I had this moment of certainty that I would drop her over the balcony if I tried to hold her. It terrified me; I stopped in my tracks, almost stunned the image had been so horribly real.

Since then, I've been terrified of that becoming a reality. It's all the more powerful for being in part rational.

My Little Grizzle-Biscuit

Utterly tuckered out from a day of squalling, my little Grizzle-Biscuit finally falls quiet. She looks to be heading into a growth spurt, which means that more than usual her young life is about eating, filling nappies and screaming. It is, no fooling, a real grind, and of course much more so on her mother than on me.

What this means is coping with the hardest lesson of parenthood - the hard truth that sometimes you can not cope and that this is okay. It certainly feels like failure, but really it's about your limits as a human being, which are both natural and inescapable.

There's no shame in needing help, but it's hard to see that when your daughter screams whenever you hold her.

Glorious Food

I'm staying with friends while my bathroom is fixed. On being told that they had burgers for dinner, while I ate an emergency pizza as I had been unable to secure other foods, their youngest complained that she wanted pizza.

I said: "That's never the right way to speak when you're told what you're having for dinner." I then turned to my friend and asked: "Is this what happens? Now I have a child of my own I suddenly want to do the 'many children would be glad of the choice' spiel."

The Wolf's Hour

There's only so much can be done with a baby of a certain age. Arya-Rose currently eats, poops and looks around in increasing frustration at the number of things she can see but not touch. According to the midwife, she is probably more than usually advanced in terms of awareness, but not of proximal-distal development, so that her ability to perceive and wonder at the world significantly outstrips her ability to explore it, leaving her somewhat grommitty. It has a similar, if less direct, effect on her parents.

It also looks like she's about to have a growth spurt, as she is drinking even more than usual and having very unsettled nights, which could be due in turn to the need for energy and incipient growing pains. Either way, it means that she is very slow to settle at night, and becomes wakeful and restive very easily. She's still not good at settling in her cot at night, but it's early days yet.

On the plus side, Hannah managed a couple of naps in the day time while I kept an eye and an ear on a sleeping Arya, which is good, but doesn't make up for those long, disturbed nights and those fractious feedings in the wolf's hour.

I struggle to stay awake during these periods, and I know that's bad of me, because Hannah needs someone to talk to her and keep her sane while she sates the remorseless eating machine that is also our beautiful baby girl.

Parenting; it's a strange state of being.

ION: Mum and Dad got to meet Arya for the first time on Saturday and seem to have taken to her. Arya was perfect with them, as she always is with an audience who aren't her parents.

Daddy Skype

As mentioned before, Hannah and Andrew live in Ipswich, and Arya-Rose lives with them, so I don't get to spend much time with her during the week.

On the other hand, Hannah sends me several photos every day for me to go all gooey over, and then file away to go gooey over at a later date. Here's one of those:

We've been told that she's beautiful by enough independent witnesses that we can be pretty sure it's not just our bias talking.

I also see them both via Skype most evenings, which is good, although Arya-Rose probably doesn't make much of it. I'm sure she can't see me with my fuzzy webcam picture on a computer screen, but I guess she might recognise my voice. I like to think so, anyway, and it's good to keep up with Hannah and what they've been up to. Her image isn't as sharp as the photos, but I can see her move and hear her gurgle, which more than makes up for a little lack of definition.

Sleepless nights

I never realised how much babies keep you awake.

I mean, I knew they kept you awake; I just don't think I understood what it meant. It means constant interruptions and frustration at the time when your patience is shortest. It means long, long waits when you just want to sleep, but you can't, because you need them to sleep first so you can put them down and not roll on them in the night (and oh my the fears the night brings to the new parent).

Arya is still pretty dependent, and doesn't like to sleep on her own. She's less than a week old, so this is not unreasonable, just very demanding. And I am acutely aware that I had this for a weekend, whereas Hannah gets it all the time.

Am I tired? Hell yes.

Am I glad that Hannah has taken Arya back to Ipswich? No. I will gladly make the trade to spend more time with her.

Of course, ask me again after I've spent an entire week with her and I might say otherwise, but this weekend was my first real chance to just hold her and it's been amazing.

Awww.

Induction day 2 - cancelled

All of an hour after my last update,  Hannah called us back in. Two hours later, I was an ersatz dad for reals.

Her name is Arya-Rose Hazel Dain Scott-Bennett, and she weighed 8lbs7oz at birth. She has dark, blue-green eyes and dark hair and is utterly beautiful.

Also, huge thanks to Mark Quennel for getting us to the ward on time.

Induction Day 1 - final update

To close one of the busier days of doing nothing much of my life, I am back at +Johanna Scott-Bennett an +Andrew Scott-Bennett's place, getting ready to kip. We're on stand by to rush back in and will be heading back in the morning for induction round 2.

It's been a long day, most especially for +Johanna Scott-Bennett of course. Sleep well, love.

Induction Day - update 8

It looks like Hannah will need another go, and that won't be until the morning. We'll be turned out soonish and backing the morning, when at least she should be top of the non-emergency list.

Induction Day - update 7

We're now onto the 'wander about and see what happens' bit.
We went out to the multifaith garden for some air and it tried to lock us in (or rather out). I suspect that KGB midwife is onto us.

Induction Day - update 6

After a slightly fraught trace - baby was mega excited about something - we're just waiting on the conclusion of an emergency delivery elsewhere to really get started.
8.5 hours in.

Induction Day - update 5

They have a midwife available, so we're doing another trace, then onwards! To victory!

Induction Day - update 4

Tea break.
We've inadvertently picked a popular day, so they've given us an hour to get some tea and a change of scenery. No induction yet.

Induction Day - update 3

We're officially in the queue.
There's a worrying sound of drilling and hammering from upstairs. Hopefully we won't need that.

Induction Day - update 2

Still waiting. We collectively failed the UK citizenship test, thus proving us unfit parents. No doubt secret agent midwife will be calling the authorities to have her placed with a more British family.

Induction Day - update 1

It's cold and snowing as we wait in the ward for the doctors. It is in fact snowing on me in the ward.
I'm a little worried about the midwife. She seems lovely, but her id card seems to belong to someone completely different with much darker hair. I think she might be an agent of some sinister conspiracy.

The Waiting Game

I know it's not as bad for me as it is for her mother, but the waiting is starting to wear on me. I know she isn't due until Sunday, but I kept hoping for something last weekend (it looked really promising on Friday) and now I'm practically fizzing with it. My anxiety about her is at an all-time high - at least until the next time - and I admit I'm worried about Hannah as well (not least because she is so worried).

I'm not posting this one until after the baby comes, if at all, so as not to add to Hannah's stressload, but I wanted to note it down.

Calling

So why, I hear you ask, choose to read The Call of Cthulhu to an unborn child? Well, partly because I won't really get a chance to read it to her again until long after she's grown out of being read to, but also to let her hear a different voice from me.

I did a number of voices for Noggin the Nog, keeping as close to Oliver Postgate's originals as I could, but you read something like The Call quite differently to even the scarier sections of a Smallfilms book (like the bit where the trolls are closing in but haven't yet been revealed as harmless bears in fancy dress). I want her to recognise my voice in all its variations (and yes, she has had Professor Gloom on Twilight Radio played to her, although not by me.)

What is an Ersatz Dad?

Around about a year ago, I adopted a polyamorous lifestyle. Shortly thereafter, one of my girlfriends became pregnant. She is going to be a mother, her husband a father, and I an ersatz dad. My intention, as far as is possible, is to take an equal third share in the nurture and education of the baby.

So far, I've sat in on scans and traces, done as much as I can to take care of my girlfriend (and her husband) and I've read to the baby regularly. She seems to respond to my voice (well, sometimes; often enough I don't think it's imagination) after twelve volumes of The Saga of Noggin the Nog and, for variety's sake, The Call of Cthulhu, and time spent reading is never time wasted besides.

The baby is due on Sunday and I admit to a certain nervousness. Unlike many parents, I've made a conscious choice to accept this responsibility, and I hope that I can rise to the challenge.

Ersatz Dad

As part of my new blog thing, this is a blog to record my thoughts and feelings on the state of being a sort-of-dad.