Grumpy Love

Before.

After.

On Friday I went out to Addenbrookes' hospital to meet Hanna and Arya, as Hanna had to bring in her ID and prove her right to work in this country. I got there just as Arya was spilling hot chocolate down herself, and as the foyer shops didn't have any children's clothes, Hanna bought a scarf and wrapped it round her like a sarong (see left) until we could get to Sainsbury's and get her a new, entirely, 100% practical new outfit (see right.) On the road we listened to the Moana soundtrack, which she is especially keen on at the moment.

We went home and had pizza, then I put Arya to bed and, honestly, she was great. We had a wee bust up because she wouldn't wait for me to get her milk and instead wanted to come with me. In the end I let her and it didn't really set her off at all, so in future I'm not going to argue if it comes up. Anyway, she drank the milk and then lay down, and while it still took a little while for her to get to sleep, she didn't make a big effort to stay awake, and that's huge progress.

Then in the middle of the night she came in and climbed in to snuggle up behind me, which was terrifying as I had no idea how much space she had and was worried I would squash her or push her off the bed if I moved in the night. Eventually, and with a surprising amount of effort, I got her moved into the middle of the bed.

El Relaxo.

I woke with my alarm at 6.30, asked Hanna if she wanted first shower and then realised it was 7.15, so once more it was a bit of a rush into ballet. She seems now to have decided that under the stairs is just the best place to get changed and insisted on it again. As it was the last lesson of the term we got to go in and watch, and she's come on by leaps and bounds. She got a bit distracted towards the end because she wanted to come and get cuddles, which interestingly she had predicted might well happen.

After, we did the teacups and while Mummy did some shopping we nipped in to get her a card (Arya wanted the pink one with 'Happy 5th Birthday' on the front,) came out with a swirly light-up techno-snowglobe and then circled for ten minutes looking for Mummy and vice versa. Thanks to the madness of pre-Christmas Ely, we were late for Tumble Tots again, but not by much. We went shopping in the afternoon and by that point Arya was flagging, so we went home and chilled. We had a bit of trouble when Arya refused to drink her juice  - we're worried that she isn't drinking enough - and tried to give her juice by Calpol syringe (the efficacy of this as a punishment was somewhat called into question by the fact that she was mostly upset that Mummy wouldn't let her syringe the juice into her own mouth, but we still felt bad.)

In the evening, she had a bath with Mummy and afterwards settled to sleep just beautifully. Not quickly, but no fuss or anything. She slept through as well, eventually calling me through at spot-on 7am. We played with her playdough for a bit and then she dragged her wooden duck up and down until Mummy was awake.

Arya was a little bit tired, we think.

We aimed for a quiet day, only popping out for shopping and terror in Ely. First we went to the dance studio to see if we could get her hairbrush back from where we'd left it, but they had finished their lessons and were closed. Then we ate in Pizza Express because hunger was a thing. After that we went to Waitrose for shopping and Arya tried to have a kip in the trolley while we piled shopping around her.
Then it was time to go home, and Arya excitedly ran towards the car... on the other side of the car park. We both called at the same time and she stopped and the car stopped and the driver came back all shaky to check that everything was all right. Arya of course was recovered, but I was shaky and Hanna was worse.

The rest of the evening was pretty chilled, with just a bit of tension when getting ready for bed. She'd used the toilet and was supposed to be washing her hands, but was dawdling and not really listening to me.

"Arya! Are you listening?"
"I was about to turn on the tap!"
"But were you listening?"
"I was doing it!"

"But... Arya! Hands away from your mouth until you've cleaned them."

"My face was itching. I. Can't. Help it. I. Had to. Get the hair. Out of my face." And then she turns this stroppy little face half away from me and mutters grumpily: "I love you."

"I love you," I replied.

"No, I love you."

Once she was ready we sat and watched Pajanimals until Mummy brought the car down and they headed off.

Adventures with Viruses

Too much cute... Rebooting cynicism...
Cynicism load failed.

Well, this has been an exciting week.

Almost exactly a week ago, we set off from my place for Leeds, to visit Hanna's grandparents for a sort of early Christmas(1). It's about a three hour drive, and although Arya went to sleep she then woke up as we took her in and we had a very, very late night in the end. This was a pattern followed for much of the weekend, as Arya was super, super psyched to have all three parents, a set of grandparents, Uncle Crazy and three dogs. She is much, much more comfortable with the dogs now she's a little bigger (although still much smaller than a staffie) and spent loads of time patting and cuddling them. Perhaps even more impressive, she's got 'how to pet dogs' down pat; none of your usual small child pooch spine battering here.

One of the reasons she went to sleep so late was that she realised that we weren't putting her down in her inflatable Peppa Pig bed, for the arguably insufficient reason that she's much too big for it now. She was adamant that the Peppa Pig bed is for camping and for Granny Spot's(2) house. In fairness, she had been looking forward to it; she told me so before we left. Anyway, to avert this issue in future, we lined up a set of options for her to look at on the Argos website and she was very taken with the Disney Princess bed. As Hanna was shattered from a) driving up the night before and b) driving out and around in the morning to find a suitable walk in centre because Arya was roasting(3), her brother David (the aforementioned Uncle Crazy) drove me out to pick up the bed. I also got a thermometer (now we have one in each house!) vitamins and a toothbrush for Arya. The last of these was a little battery-powered number like Daddy's power toothbrush and very, very exciting(4).

The new bed.

The theme of the day was very much 'collapsed on a sofa', which unfortunately meant that Arya did end up a little wired at bedtime. Or was that on Thursday?

Okay, so... I know pretty much all of the stuff that happened, but I'm going to be honest; I'm not sure what happened when necessarily. That's how tired I got.

Right, so I think she went down okay on Wednesday night. Late, but ultimately she just conked out on the new bed and I went down to spend a few minutes with family before giving up and turning in myself. It was my turn to sleep on the floor mattress, so I woke up to find Arya shaking my shoulder and telling me that she needed to go to the toilet.

Thrusday was actual un-Christmas, with turkey and presents around the tree. Arya had to be restrained from opening everything (but only really hers, so that's progress,) and we just opened one each otherwise. Then Hanna and Granny took Arya out for a girls' day. Arya, bless her, had no interest in a 'girls' day', but was delighted to spend time with Mummy and Granny Spot. I promptly fell asleep and woke up to find Arya knee deep in Mummy's old My Little Pony toys and accompanied by a brand new Chase, because Granny had gone a little mad on indulging her.

Mummy's old Ponies and Arya's new Chase.

And yes, it was on Thursday that she decided sleep was for tortoises, and instead bounced and wriggled and played with Granny's torch that we were using as an impromptu night light. It ended up requiring multiple parents to get her to sleep, and I was basically not fit for human company by the end of it.

On Friday we went to meet one of Hanna's old friends and former bridesmaids at Starbucks, and once we'd established which Starbucks we sat and had a pleasant natter broken by a nearly-very-nasty Brexit row. Andrew and I took Arya to IKEA while Hanna said her goodbyes and we went around the shop with Arya merrily pushing a tiny, child-sized trolley. We bought some bits and pieces, but really we were looking for a spare backboard and metal rack for the broken daybed. Amazingly, we - and by we I mean Andrew - found one. I took Arya to find somewhere for lunch while Andrew and Hanna packed the boards in the car and that, dear reader, is where the trouble really started.

You see, the Clio is a smallish car, and a bed is a longish thing. we had to call Grandpa Scott to pick up Andy and me and drive us home via a car place to pick up some straps. Hanna managed to arrange things so that we didn't have to carry the boards in the rain, but this did mean we were sort of crammed in, with the car seat on the wrong side and boards on our shoulders for the three hour drive home.  Still this did mean that we were truly glad to be back home. Even if I didn't have any milk for my tea.

Man, when they told her she had to leave it
behind...

And that was that, except that that was Friday and we still had a weekend ahead.

On Saturday I took Arya to ballet on the bus so that Hanna and Andrew could lie in, and then I just... stopped, because I had basically been awake since Arya kicked off at about 4.30. For that, and the fact that I had to take Arya out in her PJs and she didn't want any of the things I could find her for breakfast (she wanted a venison burger from the farmer's market, but in the absence of a GF bun, we had to take a rain check on that one,) it went pretty well.

She decided that she wanted to sit on the front seat of the bus, and then that she wanted to get changed in the front foyer of the dance studio but not when anyone was in there to see. Finally I got her changed at the bottom of the stairs, and we borrowed a hairbrush from one of the other mums to get her tangles sorted out. She went in eagerly, leaving me to chat with the mums. I think we're both doing pretty well with our respective social anxieties, and she came out entirely happy.

After persuading her to let me change her into street clothes, we headed out into the market and she rode the teacups. I don't know if she was doing it for everyone or just recognised repeat customers, but she got a present from the lady who runs the ride; a little Usborne early reader, which was lovely.

My brave traveller.

We met up with Mummy and Daddy Andrew and got her fed and to Tumble Tots (just), then home to basically pass out on the sofa with Arya occasionally shaking me to remind me it was still wakey time. I don't recall much of the afternoon - mostly I remember that at one point she got upset and told me that she didn't like Daddy Andrew, but later admitted that actually she didn't like something Daddy Andrew had done(5) - but in the evening we had fish and wedges (which went down very well) and she went to sleep with little trouble at all, although I also conked out for half an hour.

On Sunday we had cream cheese and egg pancakes for brunch, then went to the cinema. Moana proved fairly scary as these things go, but she stuck it out and, even when most complaining that she wanted to go home was glued to the screen. At home we had bolognese and then it was time for them all to head off. I was and am still pretty knackered (and coldy,) and as it's about quarter past ten, I'm going to sleep now.

Soupey twist.

(1) I dubbed it un-Christmas, but managed not to sing 'A Very Merry Unbirthday to Jesus', which might have been tacky.
(2) Her delightful rendition of 'Granny Scott'.
(3) In addition to a slight cold we brought with us, we were informed first thing in the morning that 'we've all got this virus.'
(4) We're working on the way to use it properly.
(5) Asked her to listen and told her he would take away Everest, which I did later suggest might be a bit much, since it wasn't directly consequential.

With Jesus and Everything

Christmas time is here by golly...

On Friday, the family arrived with the tree. It's a new tree from Santa, by way of Granny Scott, and it's seven feet tall; next year we're presumably going to be going up to nine, as this seems to be the pattern. This meant that a lot of Friday evening was spent decorating the tree. Arya opened her advent book - The Owl and the Pussycat - and I read it to her before getting her into bed around 9, but she actually went to sleep pretty quickly.

In the morning we woke up in decent time for ballet, and then squandered that extra time so that we had to rush again. I ended up changing Arya from her pyjamas into her ballet kit at the bottom of the stairs in ballet, because she wouldn't go upstairs without changing, which meant sitting in front of the fire door, trying to wrestle her into her clothes while shielding her modesty with my body and waving to the other parents as they went by. Still, once she was ready she went straight in on her own. After ballet we split into two teams: Andrew and Sam went to order the Christmas food(1), while Hanna and I took Arya for the everyday shop.

Dory Cup.

Then it was Tumble Tots. Arya resisted changing out of her Christmassy blue dress, but once she was ready she was great and went in perfectly. When she came out to use the toilet she was excellent and sensible and everything. After TT, she put on her Rapunzel dress and we went home, then out to the library through the gauntlet of tombolas and raffles making up the Littleport Christmas Fair. The rest of the afternoon was pretty quiet, we had dinner and then it was bedtime.

And that, as they say, was when the trouble started.

She got grumpy about getting ready, and grumpy because she wasn't as wild about Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves(2) as The Owl and the Pussycat. She didn't give Mummy a hug, so wanted to go and do that after about twenty minutes of 'trying' to sleep, then got cross with me for something and told me to leave her alone. Then she was restless for a long time and told Hanna that she was afraid someone would take her and we wouldn't be there.

Damn.

Balloon!

Now... Hanna thinks that she's infected Arya with her fear of kidnapping. Given how fearless she is most of the time, I wonder if Arya isn't rather using the things she's heard us say to try to express existential fears that she doesn't really understand. So, if we leave her in the room she can't see us, that's like when Mummy and Daddies get scared because they can't see her. Either way, she got pretty het up and took a long time to go to sleep. Eventually Hanna got her settled and I was able to cuddle her until she went out.

Then Nyarlathotep ate our faces, just to show us(3).

Sunday morning was pretty chilled, as these things go. Arya even agreed to use the toilet before wetting her nappy. It was so chilled that we once again ended up running late without really realising it. Go us.

Hanna and Arya and I went to a christening. Not, as I had at first assumed, a sort-of-christening-type-thing for roleplaying weirdoes, but an actual christening in a church, with Jesus and everything. We arrived about twenty minutes late and missed the sermon with the men at work sign (it's going to bug me, wondering what that was all about) but in plenty of time for the second hymn(4), the prayers and the whole call and response, audience participation bit. Arya was a bit lost, but super well-behaved and very keen to help put the hymn books away at the end. She then went haring out of sight around the edge of the church, and as much as I wanted her to stay where I could see her, it was good to see her being her usual, fearless self.

New car seat selfie!

There was a reception/party (not sure which a christening gets) nearby. There wasn't a lot that was GF, but someone quickly whipped up some sandwiches for Hanna and Arya to have with the ham and cheese, and some brownie for after. Arya then utterly gorged herself on pink macaroons (a pastry with no flour of any kind, you say!) and we went home via Halfords to pick up a new, larger car seat. I was pondering getting an LED lamp for LARPing, and Arya was very taken with it, by which I mean she took it and ran around the shop with it. For the better part of an hour. She also wanted to try out the bikes and decided that she really wanted the Cupcake bike and not the Princess one (that her Mummy has already paid for.) Fortunately, in the car Mummy mentioned that she'd asked Santa for the Princess bike and Arya replied: "Oh yes; that one is my favourite.")

Daddy Andrew: "And the sheep and the goat
can go on top and be friends."
Arya: They're not friends.
Daddy Andrew: Why not?
Arya: They're a sheep and a goat!
Apparently this self-evidently disqualifies
them from friendship.

Back at home, Arya played Duplo with Daddy Andrew and built a garage for the Batmobile, mostly out of animals. And for those who maybe thought I was kidding about Bat-Horse... Slowly the Bat-Tortoise I did make up, although the Bat-Turtle exists in a hundred slightly-modified TNMT action figures, and Bat-Goat remains an affectionate term for Baphomet used in the higher echelons of the Knights Templar(5). There is no Bat-Polar Bear, and this makes me sad. And concerned. Who else would fight all that arctic circle crime?

After dinner, I got Arya ready for bed, which was... slow going. We'd offered her the choice of going to sleep at my place or going straight in the car, and I think she probably didn't want to go and was stringing it out. We were going to put her in the car once she'd had at least a stab at sleep, but in the end I suggested to her that we read an extra book (as well as the day's advent book, Rumplestiltskin) and then go into the car, which worked out pretty well.

And I get to see her again in just a couple of days, as we'e going up to Leeds to see Hanna's parents for pre-Christmas.

(1) I recognise the value of reserving these things early, but I'll be honest, it did kind of feel like just spreading the stress out as 'what kind of ham?' became a total thing.
(2) Weirdly, the book keeps almost all of the murders, but the Chief Robber just sacks the two thieves who fail to locate Ali Baba instead of offing them.
(3) That frame of mind when you feel that Elder Sign is judging you. #parentalproblems
(4) I'm guessing Jerusalem was the first, because the others weren't and one of them always is.
(5) Future Arya, do not rely on this blog for history homework!